Touring the William Jefferson Clinton Presidential Library in Little Rock, Arkansas

A typical Ozark road sign

We took a scenic route

It wouldn't do to fly back to America without spending more time with my girls than just graduation weekend. I picked their brains about what we could do that was in the area because who knew when we would be back in the center of America again.

Should we go to St. Louis and see the Arch? One of them had already done it. Go to Hannibal, Missouri and celebrate Mark Twain? My girls failed to see how that would be interesting (obviously, they need to read more Twain as he's hilariously funny). Drive the river road along the Mississippi? Go see the Eisenhower Presidential Library in Salina, Kansas?

The gorgeous Ozark Mountains

on the way to Little Rock, Arkansas.

They reminded me of the Lubéron in Provence.

All they need is their own Cézanne to paint them.

Of course, then the real estate prices would quintuple.

We settled on driving down to Little Rock, Arkansas to see the Willliam Jefferson Clinton Presidential Library. All three of us love American presidential libraries because they are so evocative of the times and teach us so much about the American political experience.

Small town riverside dinner view

in Allison, Arkansas

When I first visited my youngest daughter at Mizzou her freshman year, I couchsurfed with a fun couple in Columbia, Walt and Mary. I joked then that I would be back in four years when my child graduated. I was!

Mammoth Spring

See how the water springs up out of nowhere?

My girls and I took the route Walt recommended down to Arkansas because he had suggested such outstanding local history sites during my last visit.

One of the highlights on the trip down was stopping just across the Arkansas border to see Mammoth Spring State Park with a beautiful natural spring. My girls had both loved their geology courses in college and so it was fun for them to see the water come pouring out of the ground there.

The beautiful Arkansas river trail

perfect for runners and walkers.

Eventually it will be 17 miles long.

Isn't it beautiful?

Blessed to share

American democratic heritage with my girls -

like my Mom and Dad did with me

The William Jefferson Clinton Presidential Library -
First Federal building certified by the
Leadership in Energy and Environmental Design
(LEED) program

The next day we woke up bright and early to devote the day to the museum and library. I remember when the museum was first built, critics derided it for having the appearance of a 'double wide' mobile home. I snickered when I saw pictures of it on TV because it did sort of look like one.

Having been to it in person now, I consider that a cheap shot. President Clinton wanted the old historic railroad bridge, built in the 19th century, to represent the bridge to the 20th century. His library and museum, right next to it, represented his administration of America as a bridge to the 21st century. The metaphor works. Listening to him explain it on the audioguide, I was grateful for politicians who think in 100-year cycles rather than to the next quarter or election. Where can we find more of those?

There's that 100-year cycle again.

Diagonally across from the museum

is this magnificent old railroad station

where the University of Arkansas

Clinton School of Public Service

is housed.

Let's all say this gorgeous phrase together

from the building:

"The Choctaw Route."

Even more gorgeous,

the name of the passenger train

that did this route was:

"The Choctaw Rocket."

A glorious view of the Railroad Bridge

from "42,"

the elegant cafe in the library.

A pretend shiny dime to whomever can guess

why the cafe is named '42!'

Clinton's stump speech

What's not to like?

I was Bob Dole's Story County, Iowa campaign co-chair in one of his presidential campaigns. I admired Dole's wartime service to his country, his moderate Main Street Republican views, and his biting sense of humor. It was fun to host Elizabeth Dole for a coffee at my mother's home. That was when I was still a Republican.

Even though Gov. Bill Clinton beat Senator Dole in the presidential campaign, Bob Dole was later asked to give the Inaugural Lecture at the University of Arkansas Bill Clinton School of Public Service. I love that about American politics. I admire the stature of Bill Clinton inviting him to do so, and the equal virtue of Bob Dole accepting. As citizens, we should demand our politicians not polarize us and find the common ground.

It's easy to understand why librarians

would support Clinton.

He is a famous practitoner

of recreational reading

(reading for the fun of it).

The library showcased the books that influenced him.

One of them was "Creating a Nation of Readers."

A nation of readers can continually renew themselves.

I came around a corner

 and had my breath taken away

by this fine assemblage

of young American talent.

How can we not have hope for the future, America?

Their teacher told me they were the

"The Gentleman's Club,"

2nd and 3rd grade

from Pine Bluff, Arkansas.

Norman Rockwell, did I

"do good" with this picture?

Look at those faces!

Two future leaders

thoughtfully take in

a reproduction of the Cabinet Meeting Room.

The pace of change can seem so slow in America that I forget how much things can change in one generation. Examples from the library include: it was during the Clinton Administration that gay people were first eligible for security clearances. The introduction and benediction to Clinton's inauguration seemed so overtly Christian. America would be much more inclusive now. There were photos from the Little Rock school desegregation episode that said, "race mixing is communism." Laughable. Everything seems to get labeled communism or socialism these days. This is a long tradition of over-the-top political rhetoric.

Three stellar staff members at the museum.

The lady on the right told me

that she was halfway through a PhD

but never graduated from high school

because she was a member of the senior class

of Central High School that lost their senior year

when the Governor chose to shut the high school down

rather than integrate.

 2,914 other seniors lost their senior year as well.

Zany gifts to the Presidential family

 are always a popular exhibit at these libraries.

Hillary Clinton and Socks...as a bench!

One of the things you could look up

 was the Presidential Daily Schedule

and see what the President did on any given day.

I looked up the days surrounding Vaclav Havel's State Visit.

The menu for the Czech Republic State Dinner

with President Vaclav Havel

The best description of this whole event is in

Hillary Clinton's book, "Entertaining at the White House."

While Presidents have to consider things on a level beyond the personal, one thing the Museum brings home is how the personal stories of those from foreign countries inform the President about their nations.

I know President Clinton knew far more culturally about the Czech Republic than necessary (given the 10 million population) simply because of his friendship with Vaclav Havel. Havel had taken President Clinton to the Reduta and even to Czech novelist Bohumil Rabal's favorite pub "The Golden Tiger." The pub keeps Clinton and Havel's picture on the wall.

Nelson Mandela gave the Clintons a personal tour of his prison cell at Robbins Island and described to them what it had been like there. Do Presidents still have the time to invest in that level of personal narrative in understanding a country? I hope so. The Robbins Island visit is detailed in the museum.

One thing I felt the Library and Museum couldn't do justice to was President Clinton's biggest success. His fiscal discipline resulted in the longest peacetime economic expansion in American history. That discipline unleashed a period of enormous creativity in American business. How do you exhibit fiscal restraint in a museum? Maybe the best exhibits of the output created during this time of fiscal restraint are out in the Computer History Museum in California!

President Clinton wanted his library

to echo the bones of

Trinity Library in Dublin.

My one disappointment with the library was the temporary exhibition space was devoted to promoting a corporation instead of hosting an exhibit that would teach us as citizens more about politics. I appreciate that the majority of the population loves sports, but what do the St. Louis Cardinals have to do with a presidential library? It seemed wierd that there were season ticket promotions as a sidebar to the Cardinals exhibit. Respectfully, our experience could have been that much richer with a political exhibit.

You might also like:

An Evening of Jazz at the Reduta

Entering the Land of Lincoln

What Inspires Stories?

The Springfield Race Riots of 1908

Sites outside my blog:

C-Span's coverage of Clinton's Presidential Library

William Jefferson Clinton Presidential Library websitehttp://www.clintonlibrary.gov/

Enjoying Neil DeGrasse Tyson at the UW Senior Sendoff on the Union Terrace

My oldest daughter Allison has always made it a point to listen to rockstar astrophysicist Neil DeGrasse Tyson. It so happened that the senior class of the University of Wisconsin had asked him to come speak at their Senior Send-off at the end of their semester. She suggested we go hear him speak.

I too enjoy hearing Neil DeGrasse Tyson, I adore the UW Union Terrace and have many happy memories there, but most importantly, I could not wait to have a pork bratwurst from their outdoor grill.

Not having had pork in over nine months, I was more than ready for a piping hot, freshly-grilled pork bratwurst with ketchup, mustard, pickle relish, and fresh chopped onions. I spent a considerable amount of time leading up to my trip home daydreaming about whether or not I would put saurkraut on it too, but had decided in the end to just let the other condiments speak for themselves.

The Terrace was as exquisite as ever. It was a gorgeous sunny day. There were a few sailboats out on the lake, but in the main, it was glassy and calm. The weather wasn't too hot, it was enjoyably and perfectly warm. We came early and found a front row seat. Allison had brought travel Scrabble to keep us company as we had arrived four to five hours early to make sure we could find a seat. A Chicago cop sitting behind us, who laughingly explained he had a "man crush" on Neil DeGrasse Tyson, also had arrived in Madison early from Chicago to get a seat. When folks all arrive that early, community forms.

Alas, the gigantic outdoor grill at the Memorial Union Terrace was turned off! 5,000 people assembling and no one thought to fire up the grill and sell them some beer and bratwurst. I was sorely dissappointed. I had to settle for a Reuben Sandwich from the Rathskeller. I hadn't had a Reuben sandwich in probably three years so it was a delicious consolation.

Now if this seems like a lot of detail about what I had for lunch, you haven't felt the depth of food craving of your average expat. I once read a headline on an expat blog that said "expats miss their own favorite food tastes from back home more than they miss their Mom." I cringed but understood his food longing.

Neil DeGrasse Tyson

Neil DeGrasse Tyson shared entertaining examples of America's math illiteracy. I was particularly interested in his derison for the America superstition of not having a 13th floor in buildings. He found that laughable. 

He's not the only one. In Turkey, Turkish politicians have that same mystification over this silly Western prejudice. A Turkish MP had stated that the absence of the number 13 in public places is a Western superstition “which has no place in Turkish culture,” emphasizing that Turkey should not imitate Western practices and should add the number 13 as soon as possible." From now on, Turkish Airlines will have a row 13 where it didn't have before. Can any of my fellow Westerners argue that this '13' superstition is defenseable?

He had the crowd in the palm of his hand.

It's easy to see why.

Another amusing example of America's math illiteracy was our lack of veneration for those who are experts in it. He asked the crowd, "who owns the stereotype of producing superb engineers? Which country?" The crowd offered up "Germany," to which DeGrasse pointed out that "Germany reveres mathematicians and engineers so much Germany puts them on their currency - with their equations - no less!" Later, I noticed that Turkey does too.

"Is there so much as a key or a kite on the 100 dollar bill to celebrate Benjamin Franklin's experiments with electricity?" he asked.

His frequent asides made it seem more like

we were all out for a beer together

rather than him giving a speech.

Neil DeGrasse Tyson made an excellent case that investing in NASA and the innovations that result from that are what could drive the American economy forward. He walked the crowd through examples of the impact NASA's space exploration had on the greater culture, for example, fins appearing on cars in homage to rocket fins. Another example, in 1971, Doctors Without Borders began. He asked if that would even have been a concept without the famous moonrise photos taken of Earth from the back side of the moon. Without borders, indeed. 

"Have we stopped dreaming?" he asked.

"When the shuttle program ended where you feeling nostalgic?" he asked. Everyone in the crowd nodded yes. "Nostalgia he said is what happens when there is nothing to look forward to. No one was nostalic at the end of the Mercury program. There was another one right behind it.  If we're not careful, the 2010s will be remembered as the decade of the 50-year anniversary of cool stuff that happened in the 1960s."

What it looked like to one side of me.

It was standing room only behind me.

It was uplifting to be around educated young people

excited to get out and change the world

and "make tomorrow come."

Tyson ended on a high note and had them

whistling, clapping, and rarin' to go.

What a delightful memory we created together, my daughter and I, of a splendid day on the Terrace. I love hearing a public intellectual with my family or friends and discussing new ideas together. I'm still waiting on that grilled bratwurst, though!

You might also enjoy:

The Marvelousness of Madison

Wonderful food eases newly empty nest

The Legend of Starved Rock

Engaged to be Married

The young couple

This week my oldest daughter told me that she and her boyfriend are now engaged to be married. It was exciting to hear of their commitment. I'm grateful she is marrying a great guy whom I admire and respect. Her fiance is funny too. And supportive of her. And full of common sense.

One daughter engaged and another a recent graduate makes me realize my time as an Empty Nest Expat is passing quickly! The milestones just keep coming.

Yea! I'm the mother of two college graduates!

Me and my girls

This month I had the occasion to go home to the United States to see my youngest daughter graduate magna cum laude from the University of Missouri with a Bachelors Degree in Journalism. Her emphasis was Strategic Communications. I'm proud she graduated with honors and equally proud that she graduated debt-free. She worked really hard at that, at one time holding down two assistantships and a part-time job while going to school full-time. She plotted her classes out carefully so that she graduated in exactly four years.

My daughter "relishes" her new role

as a hotdogger



On June 3rd, she starts her new job as a hotdogger for the Oscar Mayer Weinermobile.  It's been fun to learn about that opportunity as over 1,500 people apply every year and exactly 12 young people are hired to drive six different Weinermobiles around America promoting the Oscar Mayer brand of hot dogs. I'd like to think my daughter inherited a bit of my sense of adventure and desire to see parts unknown.

Suzy, the Dancing Pancake

People who have worked as a mascot are frequently hired as a hotdogger for the Oscar Mayer company. Who knew that  my child's time as IHOP's "Suzy the Dancing Pancake" or Papa Murphy's " Pizza Slice" in high school would pay off so well? Maybe, she did. Kelly makes opportunities everywhere she goes.

The Papa Murphy Pizza Slice

Two years was too long a time for me to be gone! I think it's important to probably go home once a year if that's doable. Or if I can't go home, it would be nice if my family could come visit me here. Vacation time is so short and precious in America though, I can't imagine that will be soon.

While I enjoyed my time home in America, and was pleased that every city I went to looked like it was doing great, it did feel like I was coming "home" to Istanbul when I came back after 10 days. I couldn't wait to enjoy the Turkish spring bounty of new cherries. I wondered when the Turkish peaches would hit the shelves. I hoped the climbing roses and the honeysuckle were still fragrantly blooming in my neighborhood and that I would get to enjoy them.

Yea! She finished!

I have confidence in my child's ability to thrive post-college. If she needs me, I'm just a phone call away. Maybe my highly conscious decision to designate this period of my life as my time to be an "Empty Nest Expat" has rubbed off on her highly conscious planning of how to use her most agile years.

Kelly's already set her next life goal as running a race in all 50 states of the nation by the age of 25. I think she's up to seven states now. She did her first marathon the Saturday before graduation. That's another hard part about me being an expat: I wasn't there to cheer her on. Luckily, the people of Cinncinati, where she ran the Flying Pig Marathon, made her feel like an Olympian! "Best day of my life, Mom! The people were fantastic, the neighborhoods were adorable, and they made me feel so proud."

You can read about her adventures at the University of Missouri at her freshman year blog "First Steps of a Freshman" or at her new blog "The Race for All 50 States," or at the official "Hotdogger Blog" where she will be contributing.


You might also enjoy:

Wonderful food eases newly empty nest

Happy Blog Birthday to Me!

Enjoying the Fruits of My Parenting Labors

Hello Great Big Beautiful World! (first ever blog post)

The perfect tribute to Václav Havel : the Václav Havel Prize for Creative Dissent

The Goddess of Democracy
from Tiananmen Square
circa 1989

Václav Havel and the Czechs inspired my 'Empty Nest Expat' adventure. I knew people who could elect a playwright as President were different in a way I couldn't define than me and my countrymen. The Czech Republic seemed like such a delightfully highbrow non-warlike society. I wanted to learn all about the Czechs by moving overseas and seeing what they were like.

To this day, I'm inspired by Václav Havel. This week, I discovered that one of the most beautiful tributes has been created to honor what he did so well: creatively dissent from the State.

Havel, for years a dissident at odds with the Communist regime in Czechoslovakia, led the challenge that eventually overthrew the regime, and consequently, he became the first President of Czechoslovakia and the Czech Republic.

Many credit Havel with the fact that both the Velvet Revolution resulting in the overthrow of Communism and the Velvet Divorce separating the Czechs and the Slovaks were violence-free.

The inaugural Václav Havel Prize for Creative Dissent will be awarded to Chinese artist Ai Weiwei, Saudi women’s rights advocate Manal al-Sharif, and Burmese opposition leader Aung San Suu Kyi.

I am particularly delighted that Saudi citizen Manal al-Sharif has been recognized. At a time when human beings have walked on the Moon, it seems so strange that other human beings still aren't allowed to drive a car on a particular part of our planet just because of their gender.

Showing breathtaking courage and speaking plain common sense, Manal al-Sharif posted a samizdat video of herself on Youtube driving in Saudi Arabia while she described to the camera all the different reasons a woman needs to be able to drive to fulfill her different duties. The video was swiftly removed. I was one of the 600,000-1,000,000 people who got to see it before it was gone. Awed by her courage, I also thought her reasoning was undeniable.

Manal al-Sharif is an internet security consultant in the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia working for Aramco. I predict someday she'll have her own statue in her nation.

These three Havel Prize laureates will receive an artist’s representation of the “Goddess of Democracy,” the iconic statue erected by Chinese student leaders during the Tiananmen Square protests of June, 1989.

To learn more about the prize, here is the web page.

To see additional posts about Václav Havel

Turkish Teens Out for a Zombie Walk in Istanbul

Turkish teenage zombies

Last weekend I was traveling from one side of Istanbul to another. That takes a few hours. I know the mainstream thing to do is to be armed with one of Steve Job's IPods for company, but for heaven sakes, I'm in Istanbul! If I just keep my eyes and ears open, entertainment will present itself.

Henry James said we should aspire to be "one of those on whom nothing is lost.” You can't very well do that with earbuds blaring. If you look around at bus passengers quite a few of them will have silenced the world deliberately with their earbuds. Yet, the average bus is full of people bursting with their stories.  Somehow, I usually sit next to someone who tells me an interesting tale.

There was the pretty 17-year-old Turkish girl, dressed in a tutu, coming home from volunteering at Istanbul Fashion Week and dreaming of being "Carrie" in New York City. Then there was the Turkish man whose wife had left him. He told me all about the Russian woman he was in love with and showed me pictures of her and her friends. There was a young woman who served as a translator for her father's Turkish business. The parent in me easily imagined his pride hearing her describe how she translated for him as he pursued international contracts. There was a young architect wanting to try out his ideas about public spaces on a Westerner. A college student, inquiring where I was from, soon to interview with an American company for a work/study program and nervous about his English, gratefully accepting my offer of practice interview questions as we rode along our route. What is one CD of music on an IPod compared to this fascinating parade of my fellow human beings and their hopes and dreams?

Walking through the Metro last weekend, I was taken aback to see a young person with rivulets of blood running down his face coming right toward me. I drew back shocked. Then I saw another equally bloody. I realized this wasn't people who were actually injured. "Hey Zombies?" I called out, "are you Turkish? Can I take your picture?"

"Of course." Their whole contingent appeared, splattered in blood, dripping expertly-placed eyeballs and pieces of fake flesh. They stopped, posed, and were off. I wouldn't even have had my earbuds out had I been wearing them before they passed by. It is way more fun to keep my eyes, my ears, and my mind open to the city to see and hear the people, and zombies, out enjoying their weekend.
 

100 Friends

I remember when I hit 50 friends on my blog. I was so excited! I'm just shy of 100 now and I would love to move into triple digits. Could you help me do that by following my blog? I would be ever so grateful. Thank you!

VDay 2013: One Billion Women Rising Globally & .... Dancing!

Istanbul cast of the 2012 English-language version

of "The Vagina Monologues"

What a delight it was to gather one last time with my fellow cast members of the 2012 Istanbul English-language "Vagina Monologues" and meet their families, boyfriends, and friends at our cast dinner. We reunited at an Indian restaurant near Taksim Square in the Tamirhane area.

Musafir Indian Restaurant

in the Tamirhane Neighborhood

Near Taksim



This doesn't strike me

as an evil eye, how about you?

Surprisingly, our beautiful waitress

was not Indian,

she was Turkish.

Fooled you, didn't she?



Harika and her beau were off on a

photography safari of Nepal after the play.

We enjoyed delicious Indian food. Most importantly, we enjoyed each other's company and discussed what was next for each of us. Harika was off to photograph Nepal. Tara was leaving for scuba in Egypt the next day. One cast member was flying back to Rome where she lived full-time. I must admit, the more I read about Eve Ensler and her cause the more involved I wanted to become in the future. I wasn't ready to let go of the VDay cause.

"The Vagina Monologues" is coming up on its 15th anniversary next year. It makes a statement, it has been produced in over 140 countries and raised money for local charities (over $100 million since it was first written), yet still the world if full of violence against women. If anything, it's become worse. What will change the paradigm, Eve asks? What would make everyone in our buildings, on our streets, in our cities, in our nations wake up and not take it anymore? To demand a safer world for all women? Something even bigger, even bolder is needed! Listen to her yourself (prepare yourself, its an awfully tough listen):

Eve Ensler

on Democracy Now

discussing "1BillionRising"

Eve Ensler says:

"V-Day is calling the 1 billion survivors of violence on every continent of the planet to join and RISE. On February 14, 2013, we are inviting, challenging, and calling women and the people who love them to walk out of their homes, schools, jobs to strike and dance. To dance with our bodies, our lives, our heart. To dance with our rage and our joy and love. To dance with whoever we want, wherever we can until the violence stops. We know our brothers, husbands, sons and lovers will join us in the dancing. Imagine 1 billion women and those that love them dancing. Imagine us taking up space, expanding our borders and possibilities, expressing the depth of our desire for peace and change. Dancing, 1 Billion Dancing. The earth will surely move and violence against women and girls will end. Because it can."

Imagine trying to organize one billion people to end violence against half the population of the world! I love the scope and breadth of her ambition. What audacity! I can only ask myself "what can I do to help make this happen?" I ask you, is there something you can do as well in your corner of the world to help Eve reach her goal? Can we help Eve make the earth move together?

Here is one thing we can do immediately:

 follow #1BillionRising on Twitter

Here is a second thing we can do immediately:

 sign up to receive email about her goal

Here is a third thing we can do longterm:

 organize some sort of dancing for February 14, 2013

And lastly, on VDay 2013 we can DANCE!

C'mon. It will be fun.

My First Turkish Movie -‘Kurtuluş Son Durak’

One night I was invited to a gal's night out with about six Turkish married women. My friends were organizing themselves to see a new Turkish movie with an all-female cast called ‘Kurtuluş Son Durak.’

I hadn't even yet seen the inside of our local movie theatre and was pleasantly surprised by the deluxe leather or leather-like Lazy-Boy style chairs. It was a beautiful theatre and very, very comfortable. I bought a giant popcorn to complete the experience and sat down not knowing what to expect. I didn't even know what the movie would be about.

This movie, a comedy with a theme of domestic violence, was adorable! The story starts when a glamorous woman, recently dumped by her boyfriend, moves into an Istanbul building. All of the other ladies in the building are, of course, curious about her but she resists their friendship.

The women all have their own struggles. One woman has devoted her life to her bedridden father; another has resigned herself to daily beatings from her husband so long as he doesn't touch the kids; another is facing the reality that her Mafioso boyfriend won't marry her, a young teenager hates seeing her mother beaten. Eventually, the ladies unite through their struggles, and become empowered to solve their problems. Most importantly, they have adopted a motto to "oppose all forms of violence."

The movie showcases

six skilled Turkish actresses

What I loved about the movie is that it showed absolutely beautiful parts of Turkish female culture. A Turkish woman will never let anyone starve. If food could cure cancer, there would be no cancer in Turkey! Even if a Turkish woman doesn't do the cooking herself, she has immense pride in her country's cuisine and is always quick to offer it. Turkish hospitality is awe-inspiring. They eventually wear down their new neighbor with their amazing food!

Typical Turkish Dinner with Rakı

(Turkish anise-flavored liquor),

good fellowship,

and good music

Secondly, Turkish women, actually Turkish people in general, are quick to share joy through music and dance. Have I met a bad Turkish dancer yet? I have not! Since childhood, folks in Turkey have been learning about music and folk dancing, belly dancing, and traditional dancing from their elders.

This movie was written by a man named Barış Pirhasan and directed by his son Yusuf Pirhasan. I need to give special appreciation to them as a viewer for creating this hilarious, uplifting script. Domestic violence seems like it wouldn't be a good subject for a movie, because it could seem so hopeless and dreary. There is a real accelerating problem with domestic violence in Turkey with domestic murders of women up 1400% in the last seven years. This movie seems like such a healthy way to create conversation about the problem and eliminate denial about the topic. Isn't that what is great about artists? They are always challenging us to do better, notice this, address that! Kudos, gentlemen.

This movie was a fun playful revenge fantasy similar in spirit to Dolly Parton's, Lily Tomlin's, and Jane Fonda's "9 to 5," the American movie about the glass ceiling women encounter at work. I didn't need much help during the movie to understand it since it was about the universal theme of relationships and friendship. The creators should be invited to appear at film festivals everywhere! Click on my title to visit the film's website.

Breaking the Silence on Street Harassment in Istanbul

Sessizliği Sen Boz,

Break the Silence

about Street Harassment

Street harassment is a human rights issue. It's also a business issue because street harassment costs businesses big money. I haven't felt harassed on the streets of Istanbul. I know, however, that I am not the target demographic as most young people harassed are ages 16-24. I have young friends who have experienced both rude, disgusting comments and groping.

If you think about it, street harassment is probably the number one reason women would not contemplate becoming an "Empty Nest Expat." It's an informal ghettoization of women that keeps them home: whether it be in their actual dwelling, their city, or their country because exploring their world looks too scary.

While fear of harassment has not kept me from exploring my world, street harassment still effects my spending decisions, which is why I emphasize the business consequences of street harassment in this post.

In 2011, I wanted to go to a New Year's Eve party at a friend's flat in the central Taksim area of Istanbul. When my Turkish male friends heard this, they resoundingly said, "you absolutely must not go." Why?

They said, "on New Year's Eve all the village yokels come into Istanbul. They've never seen a foreigner, they are drinking, they assume all sorts of things, and our news the next morning is filled with foreigners who were treated inappropriately on New Year's Eve because of this. Your smiling foreign face would be misunderstood by villagers."

So two hours before I was to leave, I made the decision to stay home and miss my friend's party. Between taxis and hostess gifts of wine and such, the amount I would have spent that night had I gone adds up to about $100. I am just one woman. Think of that decision multiplied by thousands of women. It becomes very easy to see what street harassment costs an economy.

In many ways, Istanbul is benefitting because street harassment is so much worse in other places. One of my friends recently moved here to Istanbul from Cairo. My friend, a highly educated and successful Arab author, said after living in Cairo for two years that it feels completely lawless. She would never move about Cairo proper using a regular taxi. It had to be her regularly-used taxi service, because a woman couldn't even trust licensed cabs in Cairo to keep her safe.

Another story of Cairo street harassment that stunned me comes from one of my favorite blog writers on Islamic spirituality. What are the business implications for a country like Egypt with so little control of its own streets?

For starters, a lot less tourists. At one time, Turkish and Egyptian populations and economies were roughly equal. But now, Turkey receives more than double the tourists Egypt does even though Egypt has the sphyinx and the pyramids and the Nile to offer.

There's a website called Hollaback! that works to document street harassment all over the world so that women know places to avoid within a city. It is also localized to document cases within Istanbul itself so people can see where most harassment occurs.

Avoiding places is a 20th century solution. Women won't settle for that anymore. Women deserve, demand, and will work for safe streets all around the world. We are half of the world's population. We aren't going to remain silent anymore.

Tourist and retail business people should appreciate and fund activists like the Istanbul Hollaback! team because they are working to create an environment safe for people and frankly, local businesses, to thrive.

Click on my title to check out the Istanbul Hollaback! website. You can share your story, check the map of harassment locations, and learn Turkish to help defend yourself. You can also learn how you can be a badass bystander who helps diffuse situations!

It's exciting to see tools like this develop to help women go out and explore their world. We didn't have something like this when I was in my twenties. A worldwide network of Hollaback websites helps give women courage. Set sail, explore, see parts unknown! Don't let street harassment keep you from exploring beyond your street, your city, or your country just like anybody else.

Vagina Monologues: We Did It!

Some of our fabulous cast

for "The Vagina Monologues"

Pictured left to right: Tara, Demet, Yasemin, me,

Monique, Harika, and Kendra

The play poster

One of my fellow cast members in DreamTree's production of "The Vagina Monologues," remarked at what an amazing feat it was for Donna M.E. Banks, an American and Kendra Tyre, a Canadian to move to Istanbul and within six months start up a theatre production company and put on Eve Ensler's play. These two ladies had known each other as teachers in Korea, and then discovered they were both living in Istanbul. "Why not create a VDay event?" they thought.

VDay is the movement to wake up the world to the gender-based violence women experience. It was started by American Eve Ensler.

The name of our

adorable neighborhood theatre

was Mekan.artı

It was just down the street from the entrance

of the Istanbul Hilton in Harbiye.

As I said in my last post, acting has not ever been one of my dreams. I was in this production because I believed in the cause. I walked away from the experience with new insight and respect for actors and actresses. For one thing, it takes a lot of time to learn dialogue.  As the oldest cast member, I joked that 'act' stood for 'Alzheimer's Cognitive Testing.' It seemed odd to me to devote so much time to something I would use all of three times.  At least if I was studying a school subject - say osmosis, or something, I could use it forever. I also had no idea the amount of time that actors need to devote to rehearsals. My goodness, it's like a part-time job to go to rehearsals every week.

But is this space not endearing?

It's like a little neighborhood clubhouse.

It held just under 100 seats.

As I was whining to a friend about how much more work it is to be in a play than I realized, he said, "yes, but you'll forget all that pain when you perform it." I was scared to death to act in this play, and as we prepared I felt wave after wave of vulnerability engulf me. My friends carried  me through though, and lifted me up with joy and support as I got ready. When we put the tickets on sale, it took less than a week for them to sell out. The last few days before the play all of us in the cast were fielding calls from all kinds of people asking, "please just four more seats?"

Opening night was full of drama for the cast: one member was in the hospital hoping to get discharged by 6 p.m. for our 8:30 curtain time, another went through three or four babysitters before finding one that would commit and stick. The second night, the lights were bright and I flubbed a couple of my lines. I quickly found my way back but it was a bit unnerving. The third night, one cast member forgot to get her suitcase out of the taxi trunk with all the costumes inside. Luckily, the cabbie realized it and brought it around in time for the show. Donna and Kendra goodnaturedly rolled with all of it.

The power of art to transform and cause us to think and grow is incredible. During our rehearsals, I faced my own intolerance of the transgender character in the show, and realized I was repulsed by the ambiguity everytime I heard the monologue. I didn't want to be, but I was. I don't know anyone in that situation. I always have to think, "now, are these the people who dress in the other gender's clothes? Or the people who want sex-change surgery? Or people who have had sex-change surgery?" I can never keep it straight.

"Wow, in real life, people with that issue, are a walking violence target," I realized. If I was repulsed and was doing my best to be compassionate and still struggling, I could imagine there are plenty of people who don't even bother to struggle. I just sat with my own feelings and felt the discomfort of not understanding. The play taught me how damn hard it must be to be one of those people. May they find kindness out there in the world. May I not be indifferent to the hate crimes they experience.

I hope to post more pictures and information about how much money was raised for Turkish nonprofits, but I'll end here saying how amazingly proud I am of my friends. Their biggest accomplishment was to use art to create conversations about difficult subjects. Among the cast we had fascinating discussions about what our mothers and grandmothers had taught us about avoiding gender-based violence, we discussed what monologues we identified with and what ones we did not, we talked about what part of the female experience isn't represented. We were privleged to help create the same kind of conversations among our audiences. I felt wondrous community develop full of love and support among the English-language speakers of Istanbul around this play. It was a privlege to be a part of it - next time though - I'm signing up for the publicity team - anything but acting!

A splendid story in "Today's Zaman" newspaper about our efforts and in "Milliyet" newspaper

You might also like: First Rehearsals - Vagina Monologues in Istanbul

First Rehearsals - Vagina Monologues in Istanbul

Great movements often start in coffee shops.

Vaclav Havel famously met

with his fellow Czech dissidents

in the Cafe Slavia across from

the National Theatre in Prague.

My expatriate American friends,

Donna and Kendra,

newly arrived in Turkey,

had decided to organize a VDay event

with both expatriate and Turkish women.
They decided to produce the play
"The Vagina Monologues"
in Istanbul.

Auditions were over.

Our first rehearsal
was at an Istanbul coffee shop.

We shyly came together,

that day in February.

I was struck by the beauty of the women there.

Each one wanted to help other women

through her own personal participation

in Eve Ensler's famous play.

 I had heard about the "Vagina Monologues" for years

and finally saw them in Madison, Wisconsin.

Eve Ensler, the writer of the play, wants to end
the great global silence
about the ongoing epidemic of violence
perpetrated against women and girls
around the world.

The play represents the experiences of women
all around the globe,
most notably, women in the Congo.
Each year, a new monologue is added
reflecting the news of the day.
I wish that wasn't necessary.

I didn't know about performing a play

like this in a conservative country,

but I took faith from the courage of our

producer/directors and the other women present.

 I have no interest in acting.

I don't have that bug at all.

But I do want to support

everything Eve Ensler does.

Her life's mission is

to wipe out violence against women worldwide.

Yes, I know.

You probably think she's crazy.

Yet the impossible happens every day.

Do you think Vaclav Havel and his Czech friends

believed the Berlin wall would eventually fall?

Do you think the black people who started

the NACCP expected they would be so wildly successful

in seeking change that less than 100 years later

there's a black man in the White House?

I am not sure they would have dreamed it.

They just started with the first step.

Can't you just imagine how

hopeless those situations

looked at the time?

I wonder what it will be like for women

100 years from now if all of us just take that first step

toward ending the culture of violence.

VDay believes the reason for the global silence

about what women are experiencing is

 the indifference of authorities worldwide,

 the instinct of denial within families,

 and the lack of public outrage

about the violence

that millions of women experience every day.

But on this first day,

it was just interesting to learn about the play

and to meet the other women.

Kendra, one of our producer/directors

listening intently to a first reading.

V-Day dreams of a world in which

women and girls will be free to thrive,

rather than merely survive.

Please click on my title to learn more.

Africa Day @ the Global Minds Book Club

On the first stunning weekend of Spring
we met to discuss an amazing book
in a beautiful home
overlooking the Bosphorus.

Knowing that my Ghanian friend Clarence wouldn't be in Istanbul forever, I asked him if we could read an African book and have him moderate our discussion at our Global Minds Book Club, which he founded.

My view of Africa from Istanbul was completely different than the view I had back home. In America, the only thing one reads about Africa in the media is generally aid, AIDS, drought, and other negative stories. Think of the most recent American media firestorm about Africa: the KONY video. It's a simplified African story told by non-native white people with motives that are hotly debated. 

In Istanbul, however, I see TV commercials aimed at African consumers. These commercials  made me realize there is a large middle class there. Clarence says there are over 50 million middle-class consumers in Africa right now.

Clarence, who founded the popular Istanbul "Global Minds" book club over a year ago, usually runs the group as a complete democracy with a 'majority rules' vote on each title, but in this case, there might have been a bit of enlighted and beneavolent leadership. 

Clarence suggested Nigerian author Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie's novel "Half of a Yellow Sun" based on this wonderful TED video of her warning all of us as people to beware the "single story" we have in our heads about other nationalities, races, and classes of people. It's really worth 18:49 minutes of your time.

I picked up a copy of her book and noticed the cover had a sticker denoting it as the 2007 Orange Prize for fiction winner. I was intrigued to learn the Orange Prize for Fiction is a fairly new prize started in 1996 (which you can "like" on Facebook for more information) that honors the best book published by a female in a given year in Britain. The announcement of the long list of candidate titles for the prize coincides with International Woman's Day.

It stunned me to realize that this was the first book I had ever read by a black African author EVER in my life. I found that sobering. I've read books about Africa, such as "Out of Africa" by Isak Dinesen (a European expat living in Kenya), but here I am, in my 50s, and this is the first time I've ever heard a black African voice in novel form. Even though I'm a librarian, a life-long avid reader, and a life-long book club attender, I hadn't even gotten to the point where I had the limiting "single story" about a people, I realized, I had NO story from their point-of-view. That means every single thing I've ever read or heard about black Africans to date was not through their eyes, but someone else's.

I do think that's changing now in America as many high schools are having their students read "Things Fall Apart" by Nigerian author Chinua Achebe. I want to read that as my next African title.  Of course, like many American women, the most recent stories I've had about Africa have all come through Oprah's eyes.

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie wrote her book about middle-class Igbo people struggling to survive in the Biafran war when she was just 29 years old (note to self - my only previous knowledge of Biafra - again from an outsider - a George Harrison album cover devoted to starving children in Biafra). It was such a riveting story. I want to read everything she writes!

I absolutely loved this book. An introduction to a new author, a new place, a new people are what makes book clubs such a powerful tool for sharing ideas and life-long learning. It was my book club that got me to pick this book up.

After I finished the book, I read more about the Nigerian Civil War on Wikipedia and was frankly astounded and reminded of the evils of colonialism. 

Norah is from Kenya and was our gracious hostess.

 She said "feel free like a housefly,"

a Kenyan aphorism of welcome telling us to be comfortable.

I told her we call it "refrigerator rights"

in America.

Good friends have "refrigerator rights,"

they can just walk in your house and open the refrigerator.

Clarence and a new member from America.

True to form, Clarence used the title

 as a launching pad to discuss all things African:

 politics, gender relationships, tribal customs,

 superstitions, economics.

It was a fantastic, frank, fearless exchange of views.

Nationalities represented for this book:

 Kenya (2), Ghana, Canada, America (3),

 Ireland (2), New Zealand.

 We all wondered where our Turkish voices were that day -

we were dying to know what they thought of the book. 

Norah's ambience included both beautiful African art,

this piece represented the Masai tribe,

and tribal music playing softly in the background.

I loved hearing Norah's perspective!

Ana, a Kiwi, me, a Yank, and Jackie, an Irish lass

We had planned to watch a Ghanian movie afterwards

but we had a four-hour book discussion,

our longest ever!

It was delightful watching twilight

descend over the bridge as we talked.

Pausing to watch the ship go under the bridge,

from Norah's balcony,

I felt so blessed.

It was a magnificent way to spend the day.

I can promise author Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

I will not stop at this "single story."

I want to read more African fiction and stories.

Her outstanding book made me care about people

I never heard of before.

It also made me want to know more.

You may also enjoy these posts:

Discussing Books with the Istanbul Global Minds Book Club

My other posts on books